When you break up with your ex, it can be devastating. It can be something that causes you to ask questions about why this happened and why the relationship didn’t work out? You might even wonder why you can’t get them off of your mind.
If you are constantly thinking about your ex, know that letting go of the past is not something that is easy. You might find that you think about them because there are feelings that you never quite resolved, or you might not even really know the true reason behind the breakup.
People are people that like to go back to what they have done before. That is why we always have routines like what we eat, the way we let our day go and what route we take to and from work.
This can be the same with our exes. When you keep having memories of your ex, it can cause you to think of them over and over. This likely means that you never had closure with them.
Why You Think of Your Ex
Here are some reasons why you can’t seem to get your ex out of your head:
Enjoyment
Your ex might have given you many times that you enjoyed. You remember these times and the chemistry that you shared. You experienced a good relationship with them in the past and now you wish that you had those same feelings again.
You Follow Them
This doesn’t mean that you are stalking them, but it might mean that you are stalking their social media. Instead of letting them out of your life completely, you might be someone that follows them on all their platforms or even likes their stuff.
When you are always checking on your ex, you won’t be able to get them off of your mind. You need to get rid of the connection if you want to get them out of your thoughts.
Missing Them
Sometimes you think of your ex because you miss the fun times you had with them, and you miss their company. It can be hard to form relationships with other people and if you don’t have that with someone else, your ex might be on your mind.
No Closure
Ending a relationship without closure can leave you questioning what went wrong. This can keep your partner in your mind. No closure can cause you to have emotional pain and to never understand what happened. This can cause you to have challenges in new relationships as well and make you unable to get them off of your mind.
Memories
Good memories can make you sad when you no longer have these with someone. If your heart is closed to love and to new memories, thinking back on the old memories is easy to do. The problem with this is that these are old memories, and you aren’t with your ex anymore.
Stop thinking about the celebrations that you had with them and the good times and remember the times that things weren’t good.
Not Having Self-Worth
Some people can’t stop thinking about their ex because their ex made them feel worthy of love. After the breakup though chances are that you felt unworthy of love, and you felt that you weren’t good enough. You might struggle with feelings of low self-esteem over the breakup, but you have to let the past go.
Don’t let the past keep you from finding new love.
Past and Present
You have to stop comparing the things in the past to what is going on in your life now. You are more mature, and you have grown. You need to stop letting your ex set the standards in your life.
If you are with someone new and you keep comparing them to your ex, you have to stop doing this. Stop letting your ex control your mind. If you are in a rebound relationship, remember that you will end up hurting the person you are with.
You Can’t Believe It’s Over
Breakups are hard to accept and if you have broken up recently it might be hard for you to accept that this happened. This can be one of the reasons that your ex is always on your mind. Remember, the relationship is over, and it is time to move on.
You have to acknowledge that the relationship is no longer there and that things aren’t going to work out with them. Stop denying the truth because you will never move on if you don’t.
The Breakup Was Hard
Maybe the breakup lead to something that changed your life totally. You know that nothing is going to be the same and the breakup has you devastated. You miss the person you used to talk to, and you feel lonely.
Remember, old habits are hard to get rid of, but you can find new love again. You can get rid of things that your ex did and get rid of patterns that you still fall into. Learn to move forward and find something comfortable to do with your life.
What to Do When You Still Think About Them
Here are some things you can do when you are not able to get your ex off your mind:
- Do the no contact rule. This means you don’t contact them, and you stop following them on social media. Don’t text them and don’t talk to them.
- Get rid of memories. Get rid of pictures, memorabilia, or anything else that reminds you of your ex. Don’t keep gifts that they have given you or pictures.
- Find something new to do that you didn’t do with your ex. Create new memories with new people.
- Remember the bad times. Remember why you and your ex broke up and know that the relationship most likely won’t be saved. Even if you forget the pain over time, do you want to go back into that situation?
- Get help if you aren’t able to move on and to find peace. This can be a friend or even a professional if you need one.
Final Thoughts
Breaking up can be hard and if you are focused on your ex, getting into a new relationship might be impossible. Make sure that you know that thinking about your ex is normal but there has to be a time that you stop thinking about them and you move on to the rest of your life.
If there is no hope of you and your partner getting back together, you have to move on and you have to find peace and happiness in the life that you are living now.
