If you are considering breaking up with your significant other, you’re likely feeling a lot of conflicting emotions. When it comes to breaking up, emotions run higher than usual. You can feel your relationship crumbling, the chemistry is no longer there, and you and your partner have both changed.
We all stay in relationships we don’t belong in for various reasons, and we often break up relationships that are seemingly going pretty well. Dealing with ourselves and other people is a challenge and finding someone to spend the rest of your life with can be an intimidating search.
If you are thinking about ending your current relationship, consider these few things before you do:
1. Outside pressure. Are your friends or family members encouraging you to break up? This outside pressure can be difficult to tune out, especially when it comes from people you trust. The way other people feel about your relationship can change your perspective of your relationship whether you like it or not. Remember to please the person you are with, not the people around you. If you make each other happy, then stick with what is working.
2. Relationship ups and downs. Every relationship has them, and you might just be going through a lull. Rather than being discouraged and giving up, consider working through the problem. If you love each other, you can work around the issues that come up in a relationship. Putting in a little extra effort can make a huge difference in the long run.
3. Conflict resolution. Think about how you solve problems- do you rush into a solution, try multiple things at once, or turn the other way and run? How you solve problems in your life translates into how you solve problems in your relationship. Additionally, the amount of conflict you bring into a relationship can affect the other person. A lack of communication, inability to express your feelings, or your partner’s inability to express their feelings can all contribute to the conflict level of your relationship.
4. Consider your issues. There are so many small problems in relationships that get blown out of proportion. If you are trying to problem solve with your partner but you aren’t making any headway, ask yourself if this is a little argument or something that’s going to come up again and again. If the problem isn’t resolvable, you might want to consider breaking up. However, many problems do have a solution that is worth pursuing.
5. A little humor goes a long way. If you and your partner still make each other laugh, then you’re doing pretty good. If you are still happy when you’re around them, you’re doing pretty good in your relationship. If you are struggling to have fun together, the relationship might be doomed.
6. Think of the future. Does your future include this person? What would life be like without them? Sometimes, the hurt of leaving a person will fade over time. In some instances, this person ends up being the one that got away, and you will regret leaving them. Consider what you want your life to be like in the future and if this person fits your image.
7. Embrace love. Are you still in love with the person in front of you? Love is challenging because we often love people who aren’t good for us. Feelings do change, and people move on; if you feel like the love is gone, it might be time to part ways.
Life and love are tricky. Thinking about ending a relationship is a big thing and shouldn’t be taken lightly. However, if the love is still there, consider staying with your partner to see what your future brings.
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