Most romantic relationships that we have will end. This is an unfortunate fact, and one we all have to come to terms with. When we start out dating someone, we are incredibly excited to be in a new relationship and to be learning all about a person we are excited to be around. As we get more comfortable and grow into that relationship, though, we can realize that things aren’t always how they are meant to be in a variety of ways.
We don’t always pay attention to those red flags, though. We want to be in a relationship so much that we put up with bad behavior, infidelity, and other small miseries in order to not be alone. When we are unhappy in a relationship but aren’t ready or willing to break up, we end up making ourselves and the people around us incredibly unhappy right alongside us until we recognize the need for change.
If you think your relationship might be ending, or even just that you are in a relationship with the wrong person, there are a few things to look out for. You might already know some of these warning signs, while others might seem to be little details you push to the back of your brain.
- You aren’t emotionally or physically available to one another and avoid having tough conversations or physical contact with your partner.
- There is a lack of respect that starts to form between the two of you
- You feel like you can’t be yourself around your partner anymore
- You don’t make each other laugh when you’re at home or out and about in social settings
- You’ve forgotten to keep dating each other, and you haven’t had an intentional night out with just the two of you in a long time
- You feel a lack of intimacy with your partner
None of these things individually predicts the end of a relationship, and it doesn’t mean the relationship is necessarily bad. However, these are warning signs that you are either in a relationship with the wrong person or for the wrong reasons.
We all justify our partner’s behavior, even if it is hurting us. We love them and want the best for them but aren’t willing to end things in order to make both parties happier. We don’t want to be alone or give up some of the perks of being in a partnership like having financial stability. We take our immediate needs and place them in a spot of higher importance than the bigger picture, which is having a happy and healthy life.
People forget that they can make it on their own; they have the strength, the knowledge, and the power to leave a relationship that isn’t serving them anymore in order to rely on themselves fully. This is a scary moment, but it’s also incredibly empowering. By being single you are giving yourself the opportunity to get to know what you like, what makes you happy, and what and who makes you feel loved.
Additionally, if you are miserable in your relationship, your partner probably is, too. If you both are committed to the relationship, you can work through these struggles together. The longer you stay miserable, though, the harder it is to get back to that place of mutual love and respect.
Here are a few signs to watch out for that can indicate your relationship might not be the right one for you:
Your friends don’t like your partner.
Sometimes your friends resent your partner because they take your attention away from them. Other times, your friends are right not to like your significant other. They might be seeing things in them that you don’t; if you trust your friends’ judgement, listen to what they have to say.
Your partner doesn’t want to meet your family.
Families can be overwhelming, and it’s often best to wait a little while in a relationship before introducing them to your significant other. However, if you have been dating for a little while and they still don’t want to meet your family, take note. Your family is important to you, and they know you better than anyone else. If your significant other doesn’t seem interested in being part of your family, it might be time to end that relationship.
Your partner doesn’t like it when you do things without them.
You change when you’re in a relationship. Everyone needs their own circle of friends and family to be with, and hobbies and interests to participate in outside of their romantic relationship. Some significant others aren’t keen on their partners having lives outside of their relationship and can be very clingy and controlling. If your partner is possessive to the point of not letting you live your life, get out of that relationship as fast as possible.
We all want to impress the person we are with and make them like us. However, if you aren’t acting like you usually do, this could be a warning sign that your relationship isn’t as strong as you need it to be. If your friends or family mention that you seem distant, negative, quiet, or otherwise changed, pay attention. Your relationship might be negatively affecting how you see yourself and how you act around others. This is a big sign that this relationship isn’t meant to be.
If you are scared of being alone, don’t want to feel unloved, or are avoiding ending a bad relationship because of other reasons, realize that you are only hurting yourself and your partner by staying. You should be in love with yourself and the person you are in a relationship with- if either of these factors is off balance, you’ll find yourself in the wrong relationships over and over again.
Take the leap and end the relationship. You will land on your feet and be stronger and better than ever before.
