Life After Death: When a Caregiver’s Job is Over

Caregivers are among the unsung heroes of our world today. They take care of family members, the elderly, and other individuals who may be unable to care for themselves. Caregivers are rarely paid what they are worth even though their 24/7 care prolongs life, gives others a break, and provides needed companionship for individuals in their last moments of life.

Whether you have been a caregiver for an injured friend or are taking care of an aging relative or parent, a caregiver’s job seems to never be over. What happens when you are indeed done caring for another person, though? Many caregivers find it difficult to separate their life from the life of the person they are caring for because of how interconnected their lives become. If that person heals and no longer requires care, or passes on, a caregiver’s job is done.

Caregivers make sacrifices for the person they are caring for every day. They swallow their stubbornness, their pride, and their attitude in order to give the other person the care they deserve. This can lead to feelings of resentment and frustration, not to mention exhaustion. Taking care of yourself if just as important as doing your job and furthermore in fact, taking care of yourself allows you to take care of other people.

Here are a few ways to cope with the loss of a caregiving identity, and how to move forward in a healthy, independent way:

• Finding a support group is incredibly helpful for people in caregiving situations. You can discuss your challenges and successes with other people who understand the details of your job, and the unique struggles this particular position entails. This group can also be there for you when your caregiving roll is over, providing you with a social circle to grieve, mourn, and find ways to move on and rebuild your life again.
• As a caregiver, you may have set some of your own needs aside while you did your job. As your caregiving ends, you might struggle to regain some of these habits that were just for yourself. Remember that taking time for yourself isn’t a negative thing; you deserve to spend some time on yourself, especially after such a demanding job. Take time out of your schedule to exercise, to meditate, to catch up with friends, and to rejuvenate yourself.
• Give yourself time to recover from your job mentally, emotionally, and physically as a caregiver. This position is incredibly difficult, and your family and friends might not realize just how much of yourself you have given for this job. Don’t be afraid to set personal boundaries in order to give yourself a safe space to recover. Let others surround you in order to support you and help where they are needed because you deserve to be taken care of, too.
• When your care giving job is over, it can be hard to remember who you are. Your job was very important, but so is your health and wellbeing. Make sure you are able to rediscover who you are and what makes you happy.